Friday, July 21, 2006

The Path of Tomorrow

I hope that the silence broken by the rapid-fire posts will bring a smile to one of you...

Over three months ago I received a phone call while I was in South Africa, it was the Headmaster of the Academy I had graduated. He asked if I would consider coming back to teach for the school this next year, something I had never planned nor expected on doing - in fact, I laughed while I was on the phone. First of all, it was in the area I grew up in, the area that has three thousand inhabitants on a good day. Second, I thought that surely I would have better things to do than teach five-year-olds Latin and Greek. Thirdly, I was going to attend Nursing School. Obviously, it wasn't going to be an option, but I agreed to consider and pray about it. I had no idea that my laugh would be a far-off echo of Sarah's, the common voice being that both of us would see our surety crumble into foolishness.

In the blur of Africa and Europe and returning to the States, the Lord (and believe me, it could only have been His working...) began to incline my heart towards staying near my family, the Academy, and my Church. However, I applied to Nursing Schools and talked to counselor's and tried to get everything together to get into a program. The same response came from each - Nursing Program closed for enrollment until Spring Semester. And then I looked at the pre-req's. I am short a couple classes, one of which is a year-long course. To cut my story short, I will be doing the pre-req's as well as all the Non-Core classes that go along side the Nursing program. This I will do at a local college (don't worry, the next town has nearly 14,000 people - a thriving metropolis), be available to teach part-time at the Academy, and most importantly, influence and watch my three younger siblings grow (13, 10, & 8 yrs) - something I've missed for quite a few years now.

That's the Path of Tomorrow as I can tell so far. I know that I can see so little of all the landmarks, faces, challenges, and joys that it will hold - but my Master has directed, and I can do none but follow.

The Course of our Lives

I have been silent for a while now, and I apologize for those of you who faithfully check for any news.
In the way of the Christian life, it seems the more you trust in our Christ, the less you "know" about the next steps in your life. Perhaps it is the overwhelming assurance that you don't have to, an assurance that conquers human fears and stumbling steps (or worse, blind ones). Or maybe it is just me that needs to be schooled in trusting and following my Lord and Husband, and being such, He gently conceals what is to come while at the same time implanting a godly desire to follow in a certain way. It has been in the past year particularly that I have rested in this, rested in His peace, rested in His guidance, rested in Wisdom itself. And how beautiful it is to follow the One Who has always seen.

Dedicated To My Children

Long ago, in the mists of time,
He fashioned you and formed you and proclaimed,
“You are mine!”
And His word proclaimed is His word fulfilled,
so it was as your Father said.

I came across you there, and I knew. The promise was mine to give.
Not an obligation, not a need, not a duty or a task I had been given –
but a desire born of love…
That great and enduring blessing, which He gave to me to give to you.

As I sat and watched you breathing, and ran my hand across your soft, dark curls,
I considered the promise.
Not to be given lightly, such a promise.
A promise, not for a day, or a week, or a year… but always.
A promise, not only for the smiles and the roses and the sunny days,
but also for the tears, and the thorns and the thunderstorms.

Through the bottles and baths, the health and the sickness,
the new lives and the fresh graves I knew our Father’s voice:
“I will share in every trouble,
I will give you each joy doubled”
In that moment your gaze fell on me, and I saw your Father reflected in your smile.
And I knew that you were mine… For as long as the journey lasts.

For as long as the journey lasts… and yet I do not know the destination.
I will carry you with me, down this path, and we will listen for His voice.
Maybe tomorrow you’ll be going away, maybe today.
It may be a good while yet… so stay.

And as He charges me, so I pledge to you:
To love in patience, knowing that this world is new to you.
To love you kindly, knowing that you have been ripped from the warmth of a womb.
To love you with joy, knowing that your face may shortly be covered with dark earth.
To love you gently, knowing that you need my mother’s touch.
To love you through prayer, knowing that in them we will be always together.
I will bear with you, believe in your purpose, and endure all things with you.
I will love you always.

Beyond this hour, beyond this day, beyond the parting of our ways.
Because you were mine… and I chose to promise… For all time.